Blogging Dead: Review of Season 5’s “Strangers”

WARNING: If you have not seen “Strangers” (Season 5, episode 2), make sure you are not eating meat when you do or else this will happen:

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In “Strangers,” the Ricktatorship is on the move once again. This time, I assume they will have a plan in case they get separated because there are only so many times I can watch Rick yell CARL!  In this episode, the crew finds a very suspicious priest, saves him, and stays at his church. Rick does not trust him (for the record neither do I)… mostly cause he only has one emotion: stupefied.

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In true Walking Dead fashion, they go looking for supplies. This time the crew goes to a local food bank where the priest suggests. There are a bunch of very delicious looking wet zombies, with melty faces in the way of the supplies (kind of like a zombie moat?). Of course, they get the food but not without grossing me out with a bunch of awesome yet ew death-to-soggy-zombie scenes. Rick notices that the priest is acting extra shifty, so he tries to skew him for answers to no avail.

When the crew goes back to the church, Carl warns his dad about some markings on the church. SUSPICIOUS. Rick still doesn’t trust the priest but the priest did give them communal wine so…. Party? At the communal wine party, Muttonchops finally gets Rick to agree to a road trip. Get the Winnebago ready kiddos because the Walking Dead is heading to DC!

BONUS: Carol and Darryl see the mysterious car that kidnapped Beth and follow it. I can’t wait to see what she is going to sing when they rescue her!

The whole episode, Bob seems to be the focal point of the scenes. Naturally, I thought this meant he was going to die. So when he decided it was a great idea to go cry outside alone in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, I thought the dude just signed his death certificate. Ever heard of the buddy system, Bobby? That dumb move gets him captured… and when Bobby wakes up we learn his captures are none other than the Terminus survivors. The Terminus hot hipster leader dude Gareth is directing the cannibals to stalk Rick’s group. And what do cannibals really love other than fava beans and nice Chianti? Roasted leg. Mmmm…. Nice day for a Bobby-Q anyone? Anyone?

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Blogging Dead: A recap and review of “No Sanctuary”

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          For being a show about the horrors of being neither one thing nor the either— neither dead nor alive, neither humane nor inhumane, neither a child nor an adult, etc., Walking Dead’s season 5 premiere has ventured into realm of absolute truth. In “No Sanctuary,” the characters learn the Terminus motto: “Either you’re the butcher or the cattle.” Perhaps the world is now exclusively made of predators and prey, making it almost impossible for our likeable characters to have a morale compass worth indulging.

As we know from the end of last season, Terminus was a bust. Instead of being an all-inclusive cruise with shuffleboard, a zany cruise director, and an all-you-can-eat buffet, it turns out it to be Hannibal Lector ‘s idea of a fun vacay. Glad there’s a good refund policy.

So during this first episode we see both separated groups (Rick and gang in Terminus and Carol and Tyrese in abandoned shack) unknowingly work with each other to terrorize Terminus and reunite the Rickatorship. Carol and Tyrese with wittle Baby Judith try to come up with a plan to reunite the group. Carol takes it upon herself to take everyone in Terminus out—distracting the lot with firework explosions and zany zombie mayhem. Tyrese decides to stay home and take care of the kid, what a modern day love story.

Inside Terminus, the group struggles to shank their way out of this popsicle stand. With the butchers (sounds like a great name for a band: The Butchers) about to kill Rick, Darryl, Alcoholic dude who I forget his name, and Glen, the group’s escape plan seems unlikely. Comically, Glen gets almost decapitated 3 times, but finally, a loud boom (Go Carol!) distracts the beheading of one my fav characters.

Characters both inside and outside Terminus question the new meaning of morality. Tyrese ultimately makes a decision to break his “no killing vow” (kind of sounds like me when I vow no more carbs, but you know, how can you not carb? I get you Tyrese). Rick also decides eff these people… I’m going to go Rambo on them, and let them turn into zombies.

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Rick becomes a butcher in order to avoid slaughter. In fact, before seeing Carol (who constantly kicks ass this episode), Rick wants to go back finish off all the cannibals at Terminus (to Glenn’s chagrin). So what’s the difference between what those in Terminus did to Rick’s group in order to survive and what Rick would do to survive? Is the grey moral ground gone in season 5?

This episode of Walking Dead is setting a really dark precedent for the rest of the season. I predict we’ll see our beloved characters lose more of their humanity in an effort to avoid literally and figuratively being cattle. No more “no kill vows”, no more gardening, no more Winnebago golf. The stakes have changed for the group, and I can’t wait to see what happens next.

 PS- Where’s Beth?!

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Top Ten Awesome Trends in 2012 (#10-6)

The end is nigh! Well, probably not, but here is a list that focuses on some of 2012’s greatest trends and occurences.

Here’s this year in awesome, #10-6 for your enjoyment.

10) People stood up for Big Bird!

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Believe it or not, Sesame Street alum Big Bird and his bevy of delightful friends taught me to speak English. That’s why I was so shocked to hear that Mitt Romney wanted to off the yellow birdie and his colorful friends. WTF?! Even though I was outraged at the thought of PBS being given the sack, I was delighted when I saw how many people came to defend my Muppet gang. And what came out of Mitt’s threats to Big Bird became pure meme gold.

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9) Another eccentric election year full of American hilariousness!

From binders full of women to Hey Girl Paul Ryan memes to Obama and Romney rap battles, this election (as most are) was nothing short of a circus. Sure eventually Americans weighed in on actual issues and stopped focusing on Onion articles and Indecision 2012, but the Internet has never been more quick to display every absurdity heard during every debate, tour, and convention. Whether Democrat or Republican, this election year was awesome for everyone when it came to pure comedic gold.

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8) Zombies are cooler than ever!

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So you thought zombies were in last year?! No way! 2012 was the real year of the zombie. After a guy actually ate another man’s face (ewww), it seemed liked the zombie apocalypse was trending. I think some people were actually excited for the impending doom that might occur if the walking dead were dragging among us. Overall though, people were still really into zombie crawls, The Walking Dead, undead video games, and cheesy zombie flicks.

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 7) The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey opens!

I know this one is kind of new. But I am certainly not alone in my excitement for The Hobbit. It is always a great year when you have such an epic movie open in theaters. I read The Hobbit, so I might be disappointed, but hey, I’m still excited and Denny’s still has a second breakfast menu. Hurray for Bilbo!

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6) A Monkey gets lost in IKEA, and it drives everyone BANANAS!

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Ok so most of us “adults” have been to IKEA. And yes, it is a wondrous land of affordable fold-out couches and delicious Swedish meatballs. The last thing you expect to see in IKEA is a stylish monkey. That’s why when a monkey in designer duds was seen lost in the supermarket (like that Clash reference?) it was totally awesome. Plus, what came afterwards were some of the best memes of the year.

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Stay tuned for the top 5!